A Collection of Poems

A Sinner's Journey

A headache in my eastern hemisphere,
And expected storms of obscenities!
My good Conscience, I will now leave you here:
For the Land of Love, I may shortly leave,
And pray good Bacchus me accompany:
Who else can me drive, and my thirst appease!
And if sweet Venus joins our company,
My perfect journey that will cert'nly be.

But alas! there was no such a journey:
I was lost in reverie and loneliness.
Memories and family, where are they?
Here they left me, cast-away, on this isle:
Rising with the billows of Holiness,
Sinking in foul and filthy, smutty mire,
And burning in fire, quenchless, ageless fire.

My corrupt smelly corpse
Absorbs every lust,
And just one fellow I can trust,
The devil-waiter on my side,
My little jinni fulfilling my desires.

Seeking spiritual healing,
In the arms of a love dealer,
All my members have been devoured,
And every inch was thrown to fire.

From heaven, my sweating body's dripping
Over poor desert monks,
Who were praying in daylight, in delight,
But never saw the Light.
Like church statues, for eons petrified,
They sang their requiem, in haste, and lied
Forever, in dirty coffins with mice.

* * *

Here in heaven I finally arrived.
A door was squeaking, and angels peeking:
I was in conference with God!
His nods were seeking answers. I replied:
"Thou art a fraud!"

Re-sent to earth I was serving
My eternal sentence with verve:
Forever with those I have loved
Without a need of repenting.

Zeus and Hera

The teardrops were pouring down the white breasts
Of the Gigantic Eternal Woman.
Sitting with the Universe at her feet,
Her whole body was profusely bleeding,
Brutally wounded by humans' follies!
She was calling her Husband and wailing,
Solely facing a scary solitude!
She is our Cosmos, in her lap we dwell.
The burning eyes and limbs were diffusing
Light to the world. Attired in black, she looked
Awesomely sad. I approached her and asked:
"O Mother of Life, why art thou weeping?"

The Earth was shaken! The long-lost Husband
Arrived—shouted! All Creation, frightened,
Ran to her for shelter, from His anger.
Bestriding her, and the terror-stricken
Humanity beneath her, the Massive
Red Titan was gazing straightforwardly,
Sipping His wisdom from Eternity.
Time was motionless, seized in His right hand;
And Knowledge from His forehead was dripping
For those who were craving to understand.
Men were climbing His body and fighting,
Dying to grasp His infinite wisdom.
Little above His navel, they stay still;
For whoever ventures into the Unknown
Territory is immediately dead:
"To touch the Divine Lips makes you divine!"

The Master's caprices were too fateful,
For the Adonises of the City
Have all mysteriously disappeared.
Forebodingly smiling the burning lips,
The lustful eyes roamed among worshipers,
Selecting a quarry for His dinner:
"O Lord! Wilt thou let me be thine to-night?"

Morning clouds loomed sad on the horizon:
A man's life has gone, a new day begun.

A Life-Long Romance

Love, Live & Learn

May the precious gift of love
And all its joy now be yours!
With the Other you will live,
While your happiness endures.
You have treasured a passion,
That has been long in reserve,
You will give to someone now
Whose heart you dearly deserved:
One of all the living to
Your very soul confide to.
And you will love and caress,
Freely feel without reserve;
To your heart's utmost desires
Free rein you happily give.
That secret of life is worth
Those sweet tears in eyes you love,
The give and take everyday,
Of the never-ending hive—
A cry for love since our birth,
A willingness to survive.

Here my case will rest:
Love and be loved, yet
The dream of life will end—
You must not forget;
We will die, but still
It's good that we lived.
Off-shore we are now,
But soon we will moor;
On-shore it will be,
Peaceful and carefree.
I foresee all things
Falling into place—
Still I am unsure!
Who can really tell,
Where's Heaven or Hell?
Here I only see
Buildings and faces,
Life is just a glimpse,
Who knows what will be!

The Book of Life is open
Though extremely short and brief,
We will cherish every leaf
Whenever we are broken.
Therein Wisdom has spoken:
"I was only a leaf
In the life garden thrown;
My Book of Deeds and Men
By vicious wind was torn,
Except one page I penned
My curse and my belief
In letters made of stone:
May those who ever scorn
These humble words of mine
I passionately adorn'd,
See no light, no dark—but
Only eternal grief!"

Flight

I missed my flight to Eternity.
Alone I sat, crying and cursing
Everyone, whoever caused me hurt,
My fate, and the day I was born.
They didn't wait for me,
I never knew why.
With tears and obscenities,
I mixed my goodbyes.

A distant galaxy they'll settle in,
My kith and kin and everyone,
Where mortals have found an elixir
Ending the story of Mortality.
For happiness cannot be happier,
And death's no more a threat,
When life is all there is.

Seeing them across the horizon, flashing,
In a vehicle of fire and photons,
My heart cried to no avail.
I caught sight of mother waving,
I saw siblings leaping on airwaves,
And fireballs bouncing.

Roaming alone long deserted Earth's streets,
Passing by haunted buildings,
Treading plants, stones, rats, and roaches,
With those reckless feet,
It solaced me I was
A giant, on a planet of insects.

Memory

I won't forget the day a dear friend I met;
Though years went by its memory's never worn.
To the sky I looked and wished that day to return,
To relive the life we have lived:
The nights and days, summer, winter, sunrise, and sunset,
The laughs, tears, work, and play,
Endless memories and events,
All in my mind stored.
How we sought happiness, in every second we lived,
Without losing innocence,
Peace, and the lessons we have learned.
All our heart desires we worked to fulfill,
All to the rim we wished to fill.

How can I deny
The times you and I
Idyllically spent;
The visions and dreams
Of worlds unseen
To which we went;
And the moments when I ... felt
Alone and forlorn, by everyone left,
Except with you my dear:
You who were here, to help and correct
What others have wronged.
You who would kindly accept
To share with one, such as me,
His burden and his tears,
To re-build and repair
What others couldn't mend.
Thank you my friend:
A good Samaritan you are,
An angel heaven-sent.

History may belittle
And Father Time forget
The love we have given,
And favors we have done;
But no one will replace
The only special place
You know you possess
Here with me to live.
I will not forget or diminish
That innocent joy and play
Together we have shared,
And words we have said —
For what life's about
But a child with his friends,
playing to the end.

Little have I written
But much you deserve.
If I can just give
As much as you have given.

Words

The aimlessly rambling words kept rising
And falling with the current,
Billowing and heaving,
To tease my talent;
They perched on mountaintops, stopped a moving cloud,
Kissed a flying fledgling, then settled on the ground.

Heaven-wards they went, like
A tedious melody that rent
Horizons, scaring a heedless angel,
Pleasing a wretched crow,
And some reckless ears
On Earth I don't know.

When everyone is gone, and all is said and done, I sit on World's Top, like a sleepless god, and do my favorite thing: bring some clay or mud, mix on medium fire, then "Bang!" Beam, boom, baboon, or any hapless utterance, I let there be world!

As I wake up, and the dream is gone, I know I am not a god, yet; but I can play one: I take and give life, to words. With such I resurrect, instead, corrupt lifeless birds, fighting the absurd, decomposing the living, and living with the dead.

My nods, shrugs, and kicks;
My moans, sighs, and cries
Have all transformed,
Into words, non-verbally felt,
When told, often misconstrued.
Earth-wards they fell,
Scattered and crushed,
Dead unburied words.

At the end I was, but, a dog wandering, among the debris. Hesitantly, it approached, had a glimpse of something: "Lo, it's a bone! Another, a third, a whole skeleton!" I saw my self alone, smiling at me.

Good Spirits

I stood on existence's shore, a lonely man,
Pondering myself and life's whole span.
A dark sea rushed to meet my feet,
Its black arms reaching out to cheat.
It tried to pull me in, I fled!
I ran, recoiling, full of dread.
I sought the sky and stars above,
Imploring them for aid and love.
I ran and ran across the land,
Until the sea was just a thin black band.
I sat upon the dunes to rest,
With pounding breath inside my chest,
Until my weary soul felt still,
Conquered by silence, calm, and will.
A vast expanse lay out ahead,
Where creatures of the night wailed, faintly led.
Others shared the quiet air.
I felt like a desert king sitting there;
A master with no power to command.
I looked—the stars still smiled across the sand.
They called to me: "Come swim the endless dark,
An infinite universe, your guiding mark.
See heaven, see the world from high."
I smiled in answer, and I joined the sky!
I saw my family and loved ones then,
Fading like smoke, unseen by other men.
A faint chant rose, a chilling sound:
Bells tolling for a man now underground.
The air grew thick with incense, sharp and strange,
From a forgotten land where things now change.
I saw the priests light flames and kneel,
Before a body whose face made me reel—
It was my own!
Ghosts from the past began to fly,
Descending, wandering across the sky,
They filled the shore, they came to claim my breath.
Was I insane? Or near my final death?
"No... I don't want to die!" I cried aloud.
I fear the angels, even the spectral crowd,
Though they be good souls, honest and pure.
I look around, and here, upon this moor,
All the good souls have come to pay a call.
No, I won't welcome them, I will not fall
Until my misery is gone, and I find aid,
A helping hand from Heaven's side is made:
To live my life—and then I'll pass away.
Then I will sing, and celebrate the day,
With all those gone, and journey at the last,
To nothingness, or life that's ever fast.

Posthumous

​My soul has come to tell its word,
Since death has passed, let truth be heard:
How men cast me aside with dread,
And how they severed off my head.
​I’ll tell the tale of how it ceased—
My love, my hope, from life released.
And though it seems a phantom's whim,
A passing ghost, obscure and dim,
Behold what fate has done to me:
It slew me, cold and silently.

​These are no lines in dusty books,
But my soul pouring, like the brooks.
I’ll tell of chains and lashes borne,
Of how my very flesh was torn,
Amidst the crowd.

​The heavens fell upon my breast,
Like crushing rocks that would not rest.
Yet I—I held the sky on high!
Was it? Was I? A hollow cry.
What use is speech or salty tear,
If none of you will lean to hear?
If no one pities all my pain,
Is all my weeping then in vain?

​My fight, my plight, my stage of cries,
Where only one spectator lies—
Upon a chair, mid empty space,
A ghost within this hollow place!

​I’ll scream!
And if my voice should fail, I’ll weep.
I’ll sink into despair so deep.
And if my mind should drift away,
I’ll forget and dream of yesterday:
That once I came,
I played my part, and then...
I walked away.

Nothing ...

​They tore my heart, they broke my frame,
And set my breast with searing flame,
To leave but ash and scattered debris—
Of a soul that was, but ceased to be.
A human face, once standing here,
Is now a pyre, a sight of fear;
The eyes look on with pity’s breath:
"It’s over now." They’ve called his death.

​It’s ended now, it’s passed away,
Existence gone—a wasted day.
A phantom life, a hollow breath,
For all was naught, and all was death.
It was but Him, and naught besides,
In nothingness, the truth resides.
My passions deep, your joys so bright,
Our sorrows in the dark of night—
Were but a dream that chose to fly,
Drawn on the void, seen by the eye.

​What are your origins, or mine?
But space that craves its own decline.
A sleeper waking to a sleep,
A vision from the silent deep—
A dream that saw itself in light,
And mourned to find itself in sight.

​My world, my soul, my being’s cry!
I did not scream, I did not sigh.
I never knew my past or place,
Nor felt the present’s fleeting face;
Upon the future’s brink I fell,
Taken before I knew the spell.
I only realized this of me:
I came... so I would cease to be.
A life begun in hollow breath—
I was but born... after my death.

The Graveyards

​The silence of the graves consumes my soul,
My racing steps defy my own control.
The breath of ghosts is swirling in the air,
The echoes of the dead—a cold despair.
I hear the mourners' sobs, a heavy sound,
As I follow them to the hollowed ground.
Toward my end, like every living thing,
No matter how the years to earth may cling.

​A bird was soaring high above our heads,
Singing in light, while we walk with the dead.
Against my will, a bitter chill took hold,
A taste of gall, a fear that’s ages old.
Like a lost child, far from a home once known,
Blinded by tears, despairing and alone.
I pray, I weep, to skies that will not speak,
Facing a void, terrifying and bleak.

​As if by chance, I came into this light,
All that I grasp dissolves into the night.
Who am I? Do I even truly breathe?
Or am I but a ghost that shadows weave?
The cosmos drifts, no order and no plan,
Life wanders aimless, far from reach of man.
So to my soul, I say in reckless jest:
"Walk on, unreckoned, put the laws to rest.
No judgment waits, no God, no final fire;
Worship but Love—the ultimate desire."

​"Be ever drunk, let consciousness depart,
Until my death strikes cold within my heart!"
In solitude, each soul is cast away,
No matter how we love, or how we stay.
The universe is filled with piercing cries,
I am but one—a fading scream that dies.
I crave for life, yet death is drawing nigh,
I fight the end, and fighting it, I die.

​Behold my fate, the ending of the way,
Where every living soul is turned to clay.
For Death shall reign, a sultan on his throne,
Through all of time, until the stars are gone.
Come then, O Death! My master, dark and true,
I see no lord in all this world but you.
And you, O Fire, consume me in your flame;
I loathe you not; I surrender to your name.

Amidst the Throng

​I walk amidst the crush, I lift my eyes,
To watch the human tide that swells and dies.
Their glances tower o’er me, sharp and cold,
Some filled with pity, some with doubt untold.
I wait and watch, recording in my mind,
Each face, each mask, each shadow of mankind;
To cast them in my art—where eyes might glare,
With sparks of rage, or kindness, or despair.
I understand them not. Behind each gaze,
A story hides within a carnal maze;
A hunger haunts the flesh, a wild desire,
That breaks the man and feeds the funeral pyre.
Without a home, they wander in the sun,
Surrendered to the Fate they cannot shun.
Like me, they’re lost; we drift beneath the eye
Of Destiny—the masters of the lie.
O, humankind!
Who saves me from the masses, from the grim?
I am the stranger, cast out on the whim
Of those who loathe the "other." Were it not
For wit and flattery—my armor in this plot—
I would not stand among you. Where is he,
The land where I might dwell in liberty?
Where all existence follows where I tread,
Drawn by my pen, by my own spirit fed?

​But here, I know not why our fathers came,
To breed and multiply and give us name.
They built the cell, the graveyard, and the hall,
They honored madness, let the reason fall.
They knelt to corpses, worshiped the unknown,
And turned to gods of shadow and of stone.
My silent screams go out, but none can hear,
My every struggle ends in failure’s sneer.
I do not seek it, yet I clutch at hope,
While dangling from the end of sorrow's rope.
The questions of the world, the "why" and "how,"
Are fleeting dreams that cloud the weary brow;
No explanation satisfies the soul.
In rivers of my weeping, beyond control,
I drowned alone; no hand was stretched to save.
The cords of hope I braided for the brave
Wrapped 'round my neck—a noose of cruel design;
I lost all grace, and sank into the brine.

​Only a breath remains! And now, it stays.
The truths return from out the ancient haze,
To be as they have been—a silent deep,
The calm of the beginning, cold and steep.
My end has come!
I’ll lay within my casket, let it close,
To sleep the sleep that no awakening knows.
The wailing of the mourners? I’ll not hear.
O Death, you are the only presence near.
The eulogies, the words of vain regret,
The hollow meanings we can’t quite forget,
The love, the world, the people, and the strife,
The childhood and the vanity of life...
They gathered here to watch my flame go dry;
Truth was my sickness—and of Truth, I die.

The Stranger

​He is the toy of Time’s trifling spawn,
Who scold him and scare him from dusk until dawn.
So he flees... like a mouse in a panic, to a cave
Or a grave—it matters not which one.
​All those he loved have turned on him now.
He curses the crowds with a furrowed brow,
Walking stunned, expelled, and nursing his wound,
Like a madman by crushing delusions consumed:
​Into the hollow of hallucination hurled,
From the well of worry, his water is swirled,
And the heaviness haunts the heart he gave.
He has fallen now into the dark,
And here he is now, gone astray,
While a wretched ending calls his name.
​"I fell in love, but love was denied"—
And who is left to hear him cry?
They struck him down for a twist or a sigh,
Or a word spoken high,
Slaughtered in exile, left to die,
Lest he love... what they love.
​He falls now, frail, without a trace,
Unknown to his kin, a stranger’s face,
In the void of nothing, his resting place.

At Break of Day

The birds have come to play,
To guide and help you on your way.
Look at you now, grown so tall—
Your wings are bright, you have it all.
The flight lesson starts, follow my lead!
Listen to me, and take good heed.
This is my color, this is my tone...
And this melody means: You are my own.
With the birds, take your flight;
If you see the sun, sing to the light;
If you stumble, sing through the night!
The wind will carry you to lands and trees,
To meet the world and sail the seas.
Go now, my little one... remember me.
My heart overflows for you,
Like rain, with wishes pure and true.
My soul desires for your sake
The brightest future life can make—
A world that is kind, and will not betray.
I long to see you, come what may,
A king upon the throne of years;
Yet, for your foes, I have my fears—
That they might pull you from my side
Until my memory begins to slide.
No! For those who oppose you are but ghosts;
They are forgotten among the hosts.
Life is short, it does not last!
Do not let those who fought you
Rule you with a shadow from the past.
You shall conquer grief, and silence the cry,
To live your finest years under the sky.
Step forward, bold, and shake the dust!
In your own courage, place your trust.
Today is yours, a day so bright—
Its horizon bows beneath your feet,
And its stars await your word tonight.

In the Night

How vast the night!
The silence of the streets fills me with dread;
I walk... and with me, my sorrows tread.
Two shadows racing where the lamplight glows,
While pitying stars watch us and our woes.
I turn in fear, lest Fate or foes of light
Have come to hunt me... in the deep of night.
My soul finds no escape from grief so vast,
Poised to crush my chest—how long will it last?
No rescue for my spirit can be found,
While all the ghosts of the past gather 'round;
With their weapons and kin, they are stronger than I—
And my present stands mute, watching me die.
The ticks of my life-clock terrify me,
With the beat of my footsteps, they drive me
Toward an unknown that paralyzes me.
My thoughts submerge me like a rising flood;
The more I gasp and scream, the more they mud
My path to the depths, where I drown and I cease.
Only the Night sees, and offers no peace—
Its unblinking eye, like Death’s cold blade,
Waits for the harvest in the dark it made.
I wander lost, by the Fates cast away,
Left without a home, or a place to stay;
The streets reject me, and the alleys sneer
At my trembling feet and my frantic fear.
My soul is wretched, and the world can see:
Why does the breeze now shriek at me?
It once was a whisper, a soft, low word,
A prayer or a song that my heart once heard,
Making my spirit like a child, light and free!
Now the stars look down from their height above,
And turn their faces, withholding their love,
As if I’m unworthy of the light they give.
The earth kicks me off, as if I shouldn't live,
Treating me like a foe on its bitter ground.
All of Nature rejects me, where once I was found—
We were friends once; each night I would come
To tell her my stories... and she wasn't dumb.

Me and the Night

​The silence of the night I hear,
As I keep watch, alone and near;
Amidst the breath of those who sleep,
This joy is mine alone to keep.
Its stillness seeps into my soul,
To grant me peace and make me whole.
Then through my mind flit images,
From time’s forgotten passages:
They all return, a ghostly throng,
The Night and I—we drift along.

​Cool breezes come to play and tease,
With scents of flowers on the breeze;
The rustling trees, the praying owl...
I miss my village, heart and soul.
I miss the childhood, kind and deep,
The rustic folk I wish to keep;
But years have fled and people passed,
And spirit-bonds have frayed at last.

​And now... the layers of the ages stand,
To bar the way like shifting sand.
I hear no sound but the present’s roar,
A ghoul that clamors at my door—
I wait for it to sink to sleep,
So I and Night our tryst can keep;
Together, side by side, we stay,
To call back years long slipped away.

The Tree

   Before him spread a garden wide, where a single tree he spied.
Beneath its boughs, two lovers lay, lost in a world far away;
Around another, children played, young and bold within the shade;
And under a third, in quiet deep, an aging man had gone to sleep,
Seeking refuge from the sun, now that his long day was done.
Dense with life, the grove did grow, stretching where the winds do blow,
Reaching out to touch the sky... then vanishing from the eye:
A vast expanse of earth and bloom, where life defied the coming gloom,
Dressed in leaves of vibrant hue, emerald green and washed in dew.
Crowds arrived from every side, o’er the hills like a rising tide,
Walking, resting, full of grace... while he watched from a distant place.
Hours passed as the sun descended, until the light of day had ended:
Men and women, girls and boys—leaving behind their transient joys.
Each visitor turned to go, back to the life they used to know,
Leaving him there, a ghost-like figure, beneath that tree of silent vigor,
Whose branches held a stillness deep, like a vow they meant to keep.

​His mind was swept by tide and stream, lost within a waking dream...
Only his frame remained in place, fixed within that leafy space:
A sacred bond of soul and sod, between the human and the God.
He forgot the tree, he forgot the hour, yielding to a greater power;
Feelings and visions, fierce and vast, claimed his weary heart at last—
Gazing past the physical veil... where the senses start to fail.
Nature holds her pride and light! But he shunned her glorious sight;
He offered her no love or care, even when she drew quite near;
His mind set sail for distant lands, for cities built on shifting sands.
He lived within those phantom walls, alone within those silent halls;
Even among the crowd, apart—a desert dweller in his heart:
For their simple minds, unlike his own, had never reaped what he had sown;
They merged with nature’s easy grace, and saw the light in every place,
Finding beauty without thought... thankful for the peace they caught,
Praising Him who gave them breath, and life that triumphs over death.

​But he remained the "present-absent," a spirit broken and malcontent,
Lost forever in his flight, a wanderer in the lonely night,
Resentful of the stars and sea, and all that life was meant to be:
Unsatisfied with every gift, he let his final moments drift.
He scorned the crumbs, he craved the whole—and wisdom’s hunger killed his soul.
If only he had felt or hated, or loved before his breath abated!
His coldness was a stubborn stone, that never broke and lived alone;
A seed deprived of water’s breath, craving only silent death.
He came, he died, he found his bed... beneath the tree, among the dead:
He tasted not a single fruit, though branches bowed to kiss the root.

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